SHIPWRECKED

31 years ago the mom who was originally my mother jump ship. Actually it was a lot longer ago. way before my parents divorced she jump. never did I see her work on the farm with us. when we moved she kept me and my older brother out of school to unpack boxes as she watched her Soap Operas.
Taking the praise for any good deed done even if convinced her children to her jobs but loudly and proudly take the credit.

On Saturday mornings she and a neighbor  would take the 7 mile car ride into town to go grocery shopping. I would tag a long a few times if I had my morning chores complete. I, however caught on to another way she manipulated others and this time the law and store for her own wants. What she would do was fill the grocery cart full of our food needs for the week place it by the door. have me sit on the bench near the door and she would say things to me like 'oh I forgot this or that and have me sit there and watch the UNPAID grocery cart while she ran through the line with a few items she said she "forgot" then come over to me put the paid 1 bag of food on top of the unpaid and walk out the door. with all the food. I ask her about it after seeing this like 5 times. she never answered me but said " IF YOU EVER TELLYOUR FATHER- I WILL MAKE YOUR LIFE HELL" I believed her and I never said a thing for years. until I guess now. maybe I told a few people over the years but well, anyone can know now. 

 My father hurt his back, ( this story is not about my Father, we have had issues but this is about my mom) did not work for a period. he had odd jobs but provided for us just fine Christ love and living in God's word was very important in my father's house. I loved the daily bread we read after dinner. Something my mom hated. my father got a job where my mom met her future husband. Alcoholic, and a very rage filled man.  Hit my mom. and threaten me. When she wanted to be alone with him she would give me a 100.00 bill and say I do not care what you do or where you go do not come home. To this day I do not know what she ever did on those nights.
\She go into drugs and one of the most horrific things is when she let the person she got drugs from rape me. years later I told someone and my mom said she "heard" I was "raped" but did not want to bother me because I might cry. the drug guy came knocking on our apartment door a few weeks later and she started yelling at him and so I thought she was really sorry but a little bit later I heard laughing and she came me my room and said ..... ants to apologize!!! OMG!!! are you kidding I waned to scream at her more then him.

So, as she marries the abuser she is stealing money from her mother, so much money, her mother has to move in with her other daughter. stealing from her husband mom. my friends, me. I do not get to keep my work checks. 

She committed a horrible crime. 2 counts of manslaughter and arson. went  to prison for many years, She could not even obey the law in prison. transfer to a different prison and now finally is released. I have not seen her, barely talked to her. do not remember what she looks like but I long for her. a family called and said she was (my mom) was very ill and wanted and need to say a few things. so I am thinking she is going to ask for forgivness. I was ready to tell I forgave her. but she is really not sick at all except in the head. this is her exact words look who put me in prison meaning her husband. starting blaming all for everything. give me a rules if I were to talk to her what I could talk about. bull. She is still a shipwreck.